The end of fighting: living from a place of love for what is real

Anandajay
May 9
4 min read

Updated: May 11

Twee vredig uitziende witte duiven tegen een rozige achtergrond

Do you also find that the struggles in the world make it difficult for you to love the world? What energy is so strong that people fight with each other so often? Conflict seems to be a very normalyet highly unpleasant form of communication between loved ones, politicians, parents and their children, and religious people. People who argue or fight for something all contribute to the emotional energy of division and separation and prevent the energy of coming together and loving from finding its sensitive place in life.

Fighting against imperfections in ourselves, even when we think that no one else is bothered by them, also contributes to this. It creates the disturbing energy of separation and judgment within us, and it is from this life climate that you then interact with the world and others.

So let us explore together what we can do differently to deal with this divisive and life-damaging habit. If you sincerely want to explore this question of life, it is important that you long for a world or a life in which love can have a profound influence, for without the longing for love, the deeper exploration of this question would become too rational and would probably only focus on wanting to get rid of the fighting, which is then just another form of struggle.

Hands of a Buddha statue lying in his lap and a Mudra gesture and a pink flower placed in his hands

May you lovingly open yourself to the value and reality of what fighting actually is. What is actually in conflict? Are relationally sensitive people fighting with each other, or is it because of the conflict between them that there is no relationship and it is just a battle of ideas? Is it even possible to fight and at the same time be open to relationship with the other person, or do we banish our relational involvement with the other person in order to unleash our fight on them with as little compassion as possible?

What is so alienating about fighting is that people no longer have compassion, but they allow their ideas, which exist only in the air, to use their bodies to assert themselves.

But why do we want ideas to prevail over our loving values? Why do we withdraw our potential to form relationships and surrender our armored bodies to an idea, a belief, or a point of view, so that it can manifest without any connection to relationships?

What makes a belief in certain thoughts more valuable than the living human being in whose brain those thoughts originated? So I ask you, where are you as a human being when you fight for your interpretation of something?

Close-up of an open book with a pink-red blooming flower in the middle. There is a window where light falls inwards, on the book and the flower, which illuminates the flower transparently

Isn't that glorifying thinking and interpreting, and perhaps even fantasizing, instead of experiencing your humanity, which enables you to love and be aware of your deepest essence?

Isn't it the lack of love and essence, and the frustration it causes, that makes you relentlessly pursue a certain idea in order to be right, as a relational substitute for love? And what if you get your way and recognition, won't you have to open up again when you feel the need to experience love?

Why go to battle only to come down again longing for love? Why push away your sensitivity and put an idea first, only to step out of that idea and seek your need for togetherness?

Why do you put yourself on this roller coaster, causing so much separation and pain in yourself, in the other person, and in the world? Can your humanity be more valuable to you than you think? Can your ability to love and be aware of your essence be more valuable than your beliefs or views?

A lamb with longer white hair, lying peacefully in the sun, next to a river bed on a grassy hill

If you answer yes to these questions, you are reopening yourself to your sensitivity and your relationship with yourself, others, and the world. In doing so, you give more value to the experience of relationship than to the idea you believed in.

Then you feel what it is like to live without convictions and beliefs, to approach life not from a point of view but as something new. Then you become curious about what is possible between you and your being, between you and others, between you and the world, based on involvement and affection. Then you feel the wish to find connection, to seek togetherness and to strengthen commonalities. When you give space to what connects and supports you, you are ready to share love with others, to experience the essence within yourself, and to contribute to the world in a caring way.

You can always ask yourself what you long for. A world in which you fight for recognition through ideas, creating an atmosphere of envy and separation, or a world in which your willingness to engage in deep human connections determines your atmosphere and your actions toward others and the world.

If you feel that the latter is what you truly desire, you will find that your interest in your thoughts and ideas will effortlessly diminish and your thinking will naturally become quieter. These are the peaceful consequences of living from a place of love for that which is real, with its blissful depth that connects you to the essence of yourself and to the essence of everything and everyone. In that connection, the struggle slowly and silently disappears.

Whenever you feel deeply, out of sincere involvement, that all struggle is a struggle between views, beliefs, and ideas that only drive people further apart, you automatically let go of your focus on your mind and its ideas. Then a meditative presence spontaneously arises in which the mind feels stillness, and in which respect, compassion, and inner peace once again become the refined values of your new, humane attitude toward life.

Book cover 'Bezieling door Inzicht - 200 levensthema's voor innerlijke groei' by Anandajay

Translation of the Dutch text: 'Bezieling door Inzicht - 200 levensthema's voor innerlijke groei', thema: 157. Het einde van het vechten. (Only available in Dutch.)

Anandajay dressed in white, sitting on a reed braided chair with white pillow

Anandajay (which means “blessing from the heart”) has been dedicated to integrating the spiritual essence into daily life for over 50 years. He has developed twelve teachings (spiritual practices), 50 music albums (mantras, pujas and ragas) and twenty books (written in Dutch) to bring you closer to the natural basis of your existence, your spiritual authenticity, and its wholesome, joyful essence, so that it can also be your shining, spiritual guide in your life. He expresses the core value of his work as: The Light of Being.